William Moseley Community : First bit of my play! Comments please!!!

Ce forum est momentanément vérouillé et ne peut accueillir de nouvelles contributions.



Page : 1 | 2 | Dernier message »

Fil de la discussion "First bit of my play! Comments please!!!"
Auteur Message
  • Messages : 1 325
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Royaume-Uni
Ok here it is, rating: PG 13-15
Addiction Day

(Act 1, Scene 1)

St David’s hospital, Ward 8. Lucy Bradshaw, 16, attractive but with a deadened look, sits by a hospital bed, in which her twin sister, Kitty, lies unconscious.

(Enter Nurse)
Nurse: Everything alright, Miss?
Lucy: Yes, thank you.
(Exit Nurse)
Lucy: The doctors have said your doing better, Kitty. Your brainwaves have stabilised, and you should be out within a week as soon as you wake up. If you wake up. (Pause) by the way, I videoed Sam’s World for you, so you can watch it when you get out of here. (Pause, no reply, just silence) Oh, Kitty! (breaks down) I’m sorry, I will try to give up like you told me! You’re in intensive care and it’s all my fault! I’m so sorry, so, so sorry! (Pause, crying) If only you were awake to hear this. But you’re not and it should be me lying in that bed! I think back to that day…

Scene 2

Lucy:… it was at the bus station…
(Side of a busy road, raining, poor visibility,)
Kitty: I know you have them somewhere!
Lucy: I haven’t got anything! Go on, search me if you want!
Kitty: Then that boy’s got them, and he’s gonna give them to you when you get there, isn’t he?
Lucy: Shut up! Leave Tom out of this, he doesn’t know!
Kitty: Fine, he doesn’t know. Doesn’t know he has a jumped-up junkie for a girlfriend!
Lucy: I’m not a junkie!
Kitty: (Grabs her arms) Admit it, Luce! You have a problem! You’re a wreck! You’ve ruined everyone’s lives! Mum, Dad, me, and all for some pathetic little pills. Even now, you’re so out of your head, you wont even bring yourself to admit it.
Lucy: Take that back, you cow, I’m not a junkie!
Kitty: No? Then what’s this? (grabs Lucy’s handbag, tips it out. White pills scatter onto the floor.) Aspirin?
Lucy: Yes actually!
Kitty: You lying witch! They’re marked with E! Ecstasy! (whispering) See? You cant go one day, one HOUR, without them. (Picks one up) I wonder what you do if I did this! (Breaks it in half).
Lucy: Stop it! Give that to me now!
Kitty: Look at yourself! You’re a mess! A doped up, pathetic MESS!
Lucy: GIVE THEM TO ME!!
Kitty: NO!!
( Lucy lunges at Kitty)
Kitty: No! Lucy!
Lucy: Yes, give me that pill!
( Suddenly, Lucy grabs Kitty’s shoulder’s, pushing her back. Kitty falls backwards offstage, a squeal of brakes, a scream- silence. Kitty rolls back onstage, only head and arm showing, blood running down her face. Scene ends.)

Scene 3

Hospital, bleeping of Kitty’s heart monitor.
Lucy: (to audience) I dropped the tablet and ran to her. I thought she was dead. My whole world crashed down around me as I knelt beside her in the rain. I called her name over and over again, but she couldn’t hear me. She still cant. Because of me. (Bleeping slows, back to Kitty) Kitty? KITTY! Help, someone help! (Doctor and Nurse run onstage) Kitty, don’t die, don’t die, oh PLEASE don’t die! Please Kitty, PLEASE!! Kitty!
(Bed surrounded by doctors, bleeping stops. Silence.)
Kitty…
(Scene ends)

My name is Miss Schaden Freude
  • Messages : 3 414
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
whoah! really good! plz update i'm anxious to see what happens next!

"blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed"
  • Messages : 1 866
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
holy cow thats good. and ditto cotaco girl. Update soon!

<a href="http://tinypic.com"><img src="http://i8.tinypic.com/24fzeyh.jpg" border="0" alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic"></a>
  • Messages : 3 414
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
^ thanx!

"blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed"
  • Messages : 2 617
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
yup, dont leave me hanging!!! please update soon!@

I am never alone.... <a href="http://tinypic.com"><img src="http://i8.tinypic.com/258rsyx.png" border="0" alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic"></a>
  • Messages : 1 239
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : mexique
woah!! that was intense!!8in a good way) please update soon, i can't wait to see what happens

- For you I will, no matter what-
  • Messages : 2 617
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
anna! ur on!!! hey i am gonna email you k?

I am never alone.... <a href="http://tinypic.com"><img src="http://i8.tinypic.com/258rsyx.png" border="0" alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic"></a>
  • Messages : 1 239
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : mexique
u bet!! lol yeah!!

- For you I will, no matter what-
  • Messages : 2 617
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
okay i sent you my little story thing

I am never alone.... <a href="http://tinypic.com"><img src="http://i8.tinypic.com/258rsyx.png" border="0" alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic"></a>
  • Messages : 1 239
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : mexique
yeah and it's so freking awesome!!!

- For you I will, no matter what-
  • Messages : 1 325
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Royaume-Uni
Ok, updates soon i promise! pinky promise!

My name is Miss Schaden Freude
  • Messages : 3 414
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
cross your heart, hope to die? (stick a needle in your eye) lol!

"blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed"
  • Messages : 1 866
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
haha emily you funny. and hurry up about that narnia maniac! its really good. you have cool choice of words

<a href="http://tinypic.com"><img src="http://i8.tinypic.com/24fzeyh.jpg" border="0" alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic"></a>
  • Messages : 913
  • Statut : Confirmée
  • Pays : Royaume-Uni
that is awsome!
  • Messages : 1 325
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Royaume-Uni
Thanx, soz i aint had the time i will do mor 2nite and post it 2moz!

My name is Miss Schaden Freude
  • Messages : 3 414
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
thanx iheartwill!

"blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed"
  • Messages : 1 325
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Royaume-Uni
Ok here's the update, bear with me here this is quite sad this bit but maybe boring so hang in there!! and also, it is a 12-15 for strong language. hope u like it!

Scene 4

Funeral, all in black
Vicar: …she was a kind girl, a compassionate girl, and one who will be remembered always as the Rock of the Bradshaw family. Her sister will now say a few words.
Lucy steps up to front.
Lucy: My sister, Kitty Bradshaw. The most wonderful, caring girl in the whole world. She was always there for me for me, right the way back and I wish I’d listened to her…

Scene 5
(Lucy onstage with MARK.)
Mark: Go on try them.
Lucy: They’re just sweets aren’t they?
Mark: Oh yeah, sure.
Lucy: Ok, then, I shouldn’t really I’m watching my weight. (Raises tablet to mouth, licks it once-)
Enter Kitty
Kitty: NO! Don’t do it Luce!!!
Lucy: They’re just sweets, Kits. Mark said so.
Kitty: Don’t, he’s lying!!! They’re not sweets! Tell her Mark!
Mark runs offstage
Lucy: What was that about?
Kitty: Nothing. Just if he ever offers you them again, DON’T TAKE THEM!!!!
Lucy: Oh, sure, yeah of course, you’re right, I should watch my figure! Thanks sis!!
Kitty: That’s ok, best buds forever right?
Lucy: Of course!
(A smile, safe with each other)
Kitty: Come on, we’ve gotta go, mum’s waiting for us at Kleimans.
Lucy: Ok.
(Kitty exits, Lucy goes to follow, stops and licks her lips, savouring the taste of the tablet she licked, then follows.)

Scene 6
(Back to funeral)
Lucy: She was my sister, my life, and my best friend. And though she’s…(Struggling now)… gone, killed in an awful… (glances at parents, can’t look at them, drops gaze.)…. accident, she will live on in my heart, and in my (under breath) fucking screwed-up (out loud) head.
(Scene ends, blackout.)


My name is Miss Schaden Freude
  • Messages : 2 617
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
that is so sad. Wow, you really got it goin girl. keep it up!

I am never alone.... <a href="http://tinypic.com"><img src="http://i8.tinypic.com/258rsyx.png" border="0" alt="Image and video hosting by TinyPic"></a>
  • Messages : 3 414
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Etats-Unis
it's so intense but how about freakin screwed-up head!

"blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed"
  • Messages : 1 325
  • Statut : Experte
  • Pays : Royaume-Uni
Wat about it??

My name is Miss Schaden Freude

Page : 1 | 2 | Dernier message »



Consultez d'autres forums